Let Truth Bloom

What do you want? A simple question, perhaps… but not one that may be all that easy to answer. Do you know what you want? I am not asking if you know how to go about getting what you want; but rather if you know what it is your heart desires? It is very easy for me to have a fleeting idea of what I may want and then quickly depart to “but we don’t have the time for that now” or “but that is far too expensive” or “we have small kids so that’s just not a possibility for us” or “with work and family commitments that isn’t doable” or hundreds of other logical reasons as to why my desire cannot be fulfilled.  And that is where I used to stop. Allowing my desires to be limited by the bounds of my own imagination. Quenching those desires before they had a chance to see the light of day. There was also a deeply ingrained perception I seemed to have that it was selfish to have desires. It took a lot of practice to get in touch with what I truly want. Honestly, it still takes effort. Even when

Hindsight can be a beautiful gift. It is a gift that helps me to remember what really matters on a daily basis. It allows me to learn from my past and to remain focused on the present. It reminds me to consistently check in regarding whether or not I am taking on more than is mine to take on. A few short years ago my days were filled with things that were not my responsibility, but I found myself doing anyway because that is what I had learned to do. It was my default setting, my auto-pilot. From the moment I woke, to the moment I lay my head on the pillow at night, my day was directed by what I thought I should do; what I thought others needed or wanted me to do; what I incorrectly assumed at the time to be the duties and obligations of marriage and motherhood. The notion that God’s ‘yoke is sweet and His burden light’ escaped my understanding because it did not feel so in my life. There was a distinct lack of sweetness. There was a distinct feeling of heaviness. I had no idea that

Once our eyes have been opened to behaviour we want to change, what is it that we need to focus on to maintain and sustain that change? How do we prevent ourselves from slipping back into old patterns? “ To live is to change, and to be perfect is to have changed often .”  - Cardinal John Henry Newman For me and the season of life I am in, I imagine a dashboard in a car. There’s a speed gauge and a fuel gauge. If the speed gets too high, or the fuel gets too low, I know I am entering dangerous territory. The Speed Gauge The speedometer reminds me to take one thing at a time, peacefully, letting go of urgency. I need to ensure the pace of life inside my home is slow.  If I’m changing a nappy, I’m changing a nappy and looking in my baby’s eyes. Getting him to pinch my nose or find his ears. Being present for those two minutes several times a day, rather than being distracted or too busy to have time for simple connection. Keeping the speed slow allows me to see, experience and be present