It is very easy for me to have a fleeting idea of what I may want and then quickly depart to “but we don’t have the time for that now” or “but that is far too expensive” or “we have small kids so that’s just not a possibility for us” or “with work and family commitments that isn’t doable” or hundreds of other logical reasons as to why my desire cannot be fulfilled.
And that is where I used to stop. Allowing my desires to be limited by the bounds of my own imagination. Quenching those desires before they had a chance to see the light of day.
There was also a deeply ingrained perception I seemed to have that it was selfish to have desires. It took a lot of practice to get in touch with what I truly want. Honestly, it still takes effort. Even when I get to the point of acknowledging what it is I would love, I can then tend to feel selfish in wanting it; or feel guilty for indulging in thoughts of its fulfilment. Isn’t it just a frivolous fantasy? Ought my mind not be more fixed on serious matters? Isn’t indulging in these desires being too attached to worldly things? And on and on my mind would go; restricting my ability to receive the beauty, fun, joy and bountiful gifts God is ready to lay at my feet as part of His perfect plan for me; if I would only let go and let Him gift them to me.
It is all too easy to think of God in the manner we think of human relationships. It feels vulnerable to dive into what we desire; to get in touch with what it is we would love. It feels vulnerable to ask for what we would love. It can feel scary. It can be easier and feel safer to anticipate the disappointment and then not even ask; remaining ‘in control’ and keeping the all-too-familiar narrative of “I can’t because…” going. All the while potentially remaining miserable when we do not need to be so.
So, what if the only limits to you receiving the hopes and dreams you hold for this one earthly life are restricted only by the limits you are placing on them yourself? What if the only thing standing in the way of your dreams being realised is asking God for their fulfilment?
Can you allow yourself to dream, then? Can you allow yourself to open your heart and dive in? Can you allow yourself to be vulnerable and ask God for what it is your heart desires?
What is the worst that may happen? Yes, He may say no. No is an answer too. But a no from God is a no for our good and what He will provide instead will be abundantly more beneficial for us. So, isn’t it a win-win?
A few short years ago I had no idea what I wanted. To be truly honest, I had spent so long codependently “caring” for others throughout my life that I hadn’t been in touch with how I feel and what I want for many many years; if ever at all.
This year will mark the third year I have created a Vision Board for the New Year. It is a delightful way to get in touch with and encapsulate my desires. I find it much easier to make little steps of progress when I know the direction in which I am travelling. A vision board sets my direction.
It is not a list of specific goals. It is not a list of to-dos. It is not a list of how I need to sort my life out. I just allow myself to dream; to set a vision. It is fun! For me, a vision board is a collection of words, pictures, quotes and other random elements that speak to me in relation to the general vision I have for how I want my life to look and feel.
Perhaps you feel like you turn into Sergeant Major with your kids most days…would you like to feel less out of control in this area? Then perhaps serenity or harmony in the home is your vision? We are not aiming for perfection here; that is a sure way to be disappointed. We are shooting for more calm days than we had this year. It is progress we are focused on; not perfection.
Perhaps you want to build a spiritual practice, like daily silence for a short period. Perhaps you want to find it easier to ask others for help. Would you maybe desire more meaningful 1:1 time with each of your children? Would you like to be more comfortable saying no to others? Do you have a dream to go on a family holiday?
Perhaps you want to have less mom guilt. Or do you want to gossip less? Are you content with how much time you spend on devices or are you eager for that to change? Perhaps you want to build a morning habit stack. Maybe you want to learn how to implement self-care regularly so that you can show up patient and calm on a daily basis with your family.
Are you desiring more balance with work and home life? What would that look like in your ideal scenario? Is there a person in your life you would like to forgive? Are you craving more meaning and purpose in your life? What skill would you love to learn or improve? Are you keen to learn how to implement right order (God first, you, others) in your life?
Do you want new friends? Or perhaps deeper relationships with the friends you already have? Would you like to feel more connected to God, to yourself, to your spouse, to your children?
Would you like to become a runner? Do you want to feel like less of a people-pleaser? Is there an element of your health you would like to address or improve? Would you like to feel more inner calm?
Remember, let go of how these things may come about…just allow yourself the vision. Set your direction. Ask God for what it is you desire and then forget about trying to have it fulfilled.
How this looks for me is: I brainstorm with the questions above in order to figure out my vision; I browse through my camera roll and calendar for the year ending to remind myself of all that happened - the highs and the lows; I find or create images to encapsulate the main elements I want to include in my vision onto one wallpaper-sized image; I set it as my phone or desktop wallpaper; I hand all I have envisioned over to God in a prayer; and I let it go!
I don’t spend the next 12 months contorting myself into trying to force the vision to reality. I just focus on making small acts of progress, daily, toward smaller general goals, leaving the rest to God and the graces He will send my way.
As I look back on my previous vision boards, I smile. I have grown and been blessed abundantly in every area I set a vision for. Am I perfect? Oh no. Far from it. But did I make progress? YES.
“True progress quietly and persistently moves along without notice”
- Saint Frances de Sales
Creating a new vision can be done at any stage of the year; it does not need to be for the New Year. And, it does not need to be for a 12 month period. I have created mini vision boards for 3 months and 6 months, just to set my focus and direct my progress.
How do you want your life to look a year from now? How do you want your life to feel a year from now? You can create a life you don’t need to escape from. Just set your vision, and ask.
“You pay God a compliment by asking great things of Him”
- Saint Teresa of Avila
I encourage you to write your answers to the questions - for whatever areas of life you’d like to set a vision for. A piece of scrap paper will work just fine; or a note in your phone; whatever is available to you.
I have spent my fair share of time and money organising the perfect diary, the perfect planner and so on, not making a whole lot of progress in action along the way. Now, I try to focus on progress, not perfection.
The same applies for how you put together your vision: whether it is a vision board wallpaper image for your phone; a few key words written on a post-it note that you use as a bookmark and only see occasionally; a journal entry you write and don’t ever read again; or a note on your phone that you forget about once you’ve put it in. You do not need to put together a beautifully artistic board of magazine cut-outs or otherwise create a wonderfully aesthetic piece. You just need to set the vision, and ask!
You do not need to ‘figure it all out’ or know how to accomplish or achieve the vision you set. Leave that to God. I promise you He has better ideas than you or I have.
“The greater and more persistent your confidence in God, the more abundantly you will receive what you ask”
- Saint Albert the Great
You can make this a fun activity! You can engage a friend for extra accountability and share your vision with them. You can email me your completed vision board if you so choose: I would be delighted to have you share it with me! My email address can be found on the Contact Page.
However, whenever and with whomever you choose to develop and share your vision, I wish you the most abundant blessings and graces in doing so. May your dreams come true.
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I love this idea. Esp how you keep it really simple.
ReplyDeleteThank you :)
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